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Archive for January, 2008

Today marks the last day of January and two-thirds of the way through these 100 Days of Peace.

Tomorrow I will take this experiment up a notch and begin my February Game. What is my February Game exactly? Glad you asked!

Each day in February (with a few noted exceptions) I will focus on several rituals aimed at clearing space in my life to make room for more of what is important to me. Clearing space means physical space, yes. But I’m also talking about psychic/energetic space. A light and flowing feeling as opposed to the busy and bogged down feeling that’s all too common for me.

I’ll still continue with my daily peace inspiration blog post, and in addition to that, I will post a Clearing Report at the end of each day’s blog entry. Here’s what I’ll be reporting on:

  • A ranking from 0 to 10 on how often I turned on The Curtis Show (that is, how authentic am I being each day)
  • Getting into bed by 10:30 PM (reading until I fall asleep)
  • Starting my daily meditation at 6:30 AM
  • Consciously eating my meals (no TV or reading)

I’ll also be blogging early in the morning as part of this game, so the Clearing Report will be added to the post at the end of the day.

By the way, today was the second day I almost forgot to post. Seems like the timing of my February Game is perfect!

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Today I noticed in me a little habit of telling myself, “Oh, I’ll do that tomorrow.”

I think it comes from a feeling of “I don’t wanna, and you can’t make me.”

I’ve noticed that when people feel like they haven’t had much of a say in what to do with their time, when they feel like they haven’t chosen their commitments or tasks, a quick and easy way to create a feeling of power is to rebel against those commitments and tasks.

It’s rebellion as empowerment.

Today I took a deeper look at why my own life and my own business feels like it’s not of my choosing. And I began to map out a new vision for myself. I plan to continue to define this vision tomorrow, and I expect to share it through my blog in the coming days. Stay tuned!

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Source of inspiration: The Oprah show

First, let me answer the question of what I was doing watching Oprah. My brother-in-law and I have a joke that it’s okay for a man to watch Oprah if he’s flipping through the channels and he comes across the show and it catches his interest. This wasn’t quite that, but I watched an old episode I found online in which Oprah interviewed many of the contributors to the movie The Secret.

They discussed the power of forgiveness, and how gratitude can be a doorway to truly forgiving someone and letting go of your attachment to being hurt by them. The idea is that whatever the experience was, it contained some gift–a lesson, an insight, an example of your personal strength in overcoming it, etc. If you are grateful for the gift, then you are grateful for the experience, and can authentically thank the person instead of blaming them for it.

One of the guests described it as saying, “Thank you for giving [in other words, forgiving] me that experience.”

I can think of a great example of this: A year ago, a woman I loved ended our relationship. I’ve come a long way in healing the hurt I felt, but there was still this nagging feeling of being wronged. What I recognized last night after watching that Oprah episode was how so much of what I have and love in my life today comes directly from that experience. After the break-up, I joined Match.com and met a woman who I’ve since become great friends with. And through her, I met other great friends. And now, I have a group of friends that I love to spend time with, something I haven’t had in over ten years. I’ve always had lots of friends, but it’s been a while since I’ve been a part of this kind of group where we all hang out together regularly. And I love it!

And it all comes from that break-up. What a gift it was! And that’s just one example. I could write a book on this experience and all the gifts that have come out of it (which I actually started).

So today I have been cultivating this wonderful feeling of gratitude. And it has helped me feel a release and a forgiveness.

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Source of inspiration: Recording of an Eckhart Tolle talk

Early on in this experiment, I practiced giving my full attention to whatever it was I was doing at any given moment.

Yesterday, I was reminded of this as I was listening to a recording of Eckhart Tolle. He said that “the primary purpose of your life is to be where you are.” He goes on to describe that as “aligning to the form the present moment takes.”

I will revisit this practice for the rest of today. And I will observe what resistance shows up, and how I tend to lose myself in that resistance.

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Due to all of the driving I’ve done this weekend (and the shortened sleep I’ve gotten the past few nights), my energy feels low. I’m headed to a family dinner soon and would prefer to crawl into bed and be unconscious.  🙂

So I’m interested in observing today how I relate to this story of having low energy, and how I relate to the people and situations I encounter from a place of feeling tired.

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Today is an interesting study in contrast. I will be driving for hours by myself, then I will be at two parties with lots of people.

The opportunity is to observe who I am and how I relate to the world in each of these settings (social and solitary), and to understand each in contrast to the other.

The challenge is to maintain a degree of observation and avoid slipping totally into unconscious reactivity.

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Source of inspiration: Coaching–Evoking Excellence in Others by James Flaherty

One of the coolest concepts in this coaching book I’m reading is the idea that, as human beings, we are always (yes, literally always) relating. To people, to things, to ideas, to situations, etc.

The next 3 days will be very social days for me. So I would like to explore this idea by observing how I relate to people in these situations. I’ve blogged previously about many exercises I can do–watching for The Curtis Show, etc.

I plan to report back on what I notice…

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