Comments on: Day 61 (2008-05-05): Pretending http://100daysofpeace.wordpress.com/2008/05/05/day-61-2008-05-05-pretending/ A 100-day experience of inner peace Fri, 08 Aug 2008 20:35:05 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=MU By: jessjett http://100daysofpeace.wordpress.com/2008/05/05/day-61-2008-05-05-pretending/#comment-318 jessjett Tue, 06 May 2008 16:41:26 +0000 http://100daysofpeace.wordpress.com/?p=166#comment-318 I can relate. Although for me, it's more pretending that I belong wherever I am. Like by being at a certain place (primarily a social setting, but it can also apply to a physical location), I'm claiming to belong there, but since I don't feel like I belong, I'm actually a fraud. My need to connect is real, but only if it is authentic. In order for it to be authentic, I have to be open. Hence my struggle between connecting and not wanting to be vulnerable. A feeling of belonging is rare for me, so this feeling of being a fraud shows up often. I might even say that it shows up more with people I'm close to as they're the ones who know more about me and can expose me. This is why trust is so important. I can relate. Although for me, it’s more pretending that I belong wherever I am. Like by being at a certain place (primarily a social setting, but it can also apply to a physical location), I’m claiming to belong there, but since I don’t feel like I belong, I’m actually a fraud.

My need to connect is real, but only if it is authentic. In order for it to be authentic, I have to be open. Hence my struggle between connecting and not wanting to be vulnerable.

A feeling of belonging is rare for me, so this feeling of being a fraud shows up often. I might even say that it shows up more with people I’m close to as they’re the ones who know more about me and can expose me. This is why trust is so important.

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